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✨ LATEST ISSUE • From ULR Issue 15 – REFUSE

Old Dreams of Home, Kolkata

Flailing fish in cauldron desires end. The fish-man's siren song offers a dying, deceptive lie.

July 25, 2026
  1. You were where the fennel seed was.
    Caught in my gums.
    Sharp and tricky, I curled my tongue into a knot
    over a thousand parts of one second
    Frustrated, I reached a finger in to pull you out
    and flicked you away.
  2. What does a grandmother do to survive?
    Mine fed me thrice a day for twenty-five years—food, love, lies.
    While she was full with all her own swallowed refusal
    What is left of her now that I am gone?
    She still feeds—secrets, curses, leftovers
    To the crow outside the window.
  3. I was the taut bends of live fish
    Flailing, stretching inside a perched cauldron
    Calling to be butchered.
    And draining out the siren songs from elsewhere was the fish-man’s call,
    A huge katla hung around his neck, dying.
    He was trying to sell me a lie.
📖
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Apabrita Mitra Sarkar

Apabrita is a PhD researcher at Durham University. She works on South Asian women's writing and conflict studies. She has previously written and published poetry for writingwomen.co. She also works as a translator and is currently translating a volume of her mother's poetry. She now tries to take time out from her PhD to focus on writing poetry more often.

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